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Tired [Mar. 30th, 2014|03:49 pm]
Tired of being bulletproof
Tired of being the man with the answers
Tired of responsibility
Tired of it not being 2008
Tired of the fact that full of care, I have no time to stand and stare
Tired of being out if shape and unable to make the effort I need to get there
Tired of the lack of silence
Tired of this overdone, over connected, oversold technological crutch
Tired of everything being over-thought and over-worried
Tired of there being surprises that aren't really surprises
Tired of the lack of Shock & Awe
Tired of the fighting, tired of the bullshit, tired of the style.

I am too tired to rage against the dying of the light.

Posted via m.livejournal.com.

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(no subject) [Mar. 31st, 2010|06:38 am]
I went away for a very fun, highly alcoholic weekend.

2.30 Monday afternoon, I am in the pub, phone rings and it's the office. I assume someone in my bit of the office looking for a file or something.

So I answer with "I'm in the pub, I've had five pints, whaddayawant?"

It's one of the partners and he's got me on speakerphone.

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(no subject) [Feb. 6th, 2010|10:08 pm]
OK, ten seconds ago, I was lying on the bed and I realised.

I am reading a book on junk bond history with a glass of Talisker (decent single malt, for those of you clueless) while waiting for my fiance to reappear so we could finish watching House and I was really really happy...
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(no subject) [Jan. 17th, 2010|12:21 am]
[music |Disturbed - Prayer]

Right, the last time I wrote anything vaguely sensible on here was over a year ago.

What's gone on since then?

Well, I qualified ACA (that means Mr Accountant to y'all) in exam terms back in July 08 or something, had the necessary time served by end of Jan 09. Did job interviews in Oct/Nov 08, got made an offer by a firm in Surrey who then withdrew it - much swearing. More interviews followed, and I had an interesting one. Meet the partner in a pub, we chat, he ends up with the phrase "you're a bit self-confident, a bit too arrogant" and invites me back for another interview. Get an offer from this firm on Christmas Eve 2008 and take their arm off at the shoulder.

Handed in my notice at TMC first week of Jan, with the phrase "Morning Sarah, can I come and ruin your day?" This put management en masse in a bit of a shitty mood, and since I hadn't told anyone else in the office they were all wondering what was going on. Deceitful little shite, me? Yes, actually. Got a memorable text later that week "Don't want 2 pry but are you thinking of leaving us?" when Emma/Sharon et al found out.

Did the househunting thing, looked at all manner of places in Wokingham and fell in love with a 1 bed flat in a converted Victorian thing with a Travelodge-stylee annex out the back (we're in the old, and thus good, bit) and finally moved in with Vickie and sans any housemates. Had a substantial prune of our collective possessions in the process, built some furniture (shelves, tables, etc) and a year on, despite the growing number of sharp things in the kitchen she has not yet either killed me or sold my kidneys.

Work has proceeded well, I think - they all seem happy enough to have not sacked me; I'm currently almost 4 months through a secondment to a "FTSE listed financial institution" who are having some asset management issues. Hopefully this ends at the end of February as I can't hack the commuting to Croydon for much bloody longer. I've managed to keep a few audits, they've been designated as "mine", and the fact that the bloke who did them before doesn't want them back helps!

Archery. Yes. Well. Target panic bites again, shot the Nat Indoors in Feb 09 aiming 8 ring at 2 o'clock. Qualifying went 105 (with a miss!), 116, 115, 116, 115 for 567; eliminations went 118/119/117/117/116 for 587 and losing to Simon Terry by 2mm on the third (and thus measured) arrow. Field season was largely shite, but I got my gold arrowhead at Dearne so not a total writeoff. Didn't make the World Games team, didn't do the Europeans because I was shooting like a monkey with Ebola and thought paying to do that in a foreign country was a bit much - as it turns out, it was 30-35 degrees C there and hellishly humid. Quite glad I didn't go, I would not have distinguished myself. Bought a GMX, shot it a bit - either lots of 10s (1243 FITA with no sight marks) or lots of 6s (day 2 at Penicuik) so decided to part with it.

And that gets us up to here, more or less. In family terms, Alice (my cousin) has got married; Joan (grandma, dad's side) finally faded away shortly after; the Aussie side have been fading fast losing two or three this year, one to cancer on Christmas Day, which must have been a bit of a bastard; Jo has moved in with Toby having finally left that flak-jacket foxtrot that was Djanogly for an upmarket private school in North London that comes with it's own cottage at discount rates, and she's now got a pair of rabbits that eat anything within toothrange of the ground including two phone cables so far; Phyll and Pete are still in Langham in the Limes, although I think Phyll's battles with the garden are becoming more of a battle of attrition as she can't manage it all on her own for much longer (so I go and take down trees etc on a semiregular basis); Vickie's family are still all with us and the next generation has started in the form of Lillian Krystyna (sp?) which is slightly scary.

What else? I have a new car - the Volvo had a chassis that was starting to rust more heavily than was acceptable, so it had to go, I am now Mondeo Man (2.0 diesel, 53mpg) which is more affordable. Vickie and I went on a holiday in September to Cornwall courtesy of my parents and stayed at Pemberknowse where we used to go for holidays when I was a kid - nothing changed, but they've mercifully moved those bastard bow-fronted glass cabinets so there's less risk you dump the tea tray into them. Was really nice to escape to somewhere quiet and by the sea. Decided that I miss the sea and want to be closer to it in future. OK, gotta admit it, I have been thinking more and more recently that if I was to chuck archery here and now I would miss it but not feel I'd fallen short. Done more than most people ever will, shot for GB, been in the top 10 in the world, so if I was to do a Malynn (RIP - that was another one, Paul Malynn, an absolute legend of an Aussie archer that I regrettably never met, died of cancer this year) and chuck the lot off a bridge I could move to another sport and see what happens without really looking back. Keogh did it for windsurfing for a few years, tempting to do the same. But in practical terms, I won't do it because I still enjoy it in a masochistic way. I'm not ready for golf, and that's the only other option around here.

Oh, and I made Channel 4 (and apparently ITN lunchtime) news as Mr Grumpy from Wokingham having spent an hour and a half standing on a platform waiting for a train that never came a few weeks ago. This was after having got stuck on the M25 and ended up sleeping in the office at Croydon just before Xmas... I have printouts to prove I was working at 2.45 in the morning.

And that's about it. And as it's past midnight, I'm going to bed (God, how old am I!) so I can get more than 6 hours sleep. Current Croydon days: bed at 10.30ish, wake up 5.30 so max 7 hours kip for 4 months now. I don't need much more than that, to be honest, but I do need a _bit_ more. So weekends now involve a serious attempt to get at least 10 hours solid sleep, and this crap is cutting into that time, so screw you all.

I'll leave you with this little line:
And sometimes, I wanna see the sunshine
The night is cold, I can freeze so hard
And sometimes, I wanna see the starlight
The moon is dark, we can see the stars forever!
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(no subject) [Mar. 12th, 2009|09:19 pm]
Dating conversations at 18 & 38.


“I like the color blue.”

“That’s a good color. I like pizza.”

“Pizza is good. Sometimes I eat pizza for breakfast.”

“That is interesting and good.”

“I like to think about the future. Like, what am I going to be doing next week?”

“That is very interesting as well.”

“And I think about things.”

“Like what?”

“Well, I think the Beastie Boys were right. It is necessary to fight...”

“...for your right to party. I think about that too.”

“We both think about things deeply.”


“Delineate your precise your timeline for procreation, preferably in increments of months rather than years.”

“It depends whether I’d be able to fund their private school education from current liquidity or if I’d require a reverse mortgage.”

“If we were hypothetically married, would you foresee joint checking accounts or individual ones?”

“I think we’d pool basic necessities such as groceries and Netflix but maintain individual lifestyle accounts. Split the difference on couples therapy.”

“Would this be an opportune time to review the details of our pre-nuptial contracts?”

“Fine, but the copy in my purse is laminated. You’ll be able to sign it after our third date--that’s when I’ll be comfortable enough to introduce you to my lawyer.”
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(no subject) [Nov. 11th, 2008|07:05 am]
Well, quicky on the weekend:

FITA 25, 563 with a miss
FITA 18, 580 with a 6
FITA 25, 577 with a 7
FITA 18, 587 with no flinching!
Combined of 1143 and 1164.

Two GB qualifying scores, three PBs, three county and regional records.

Other thoughts - the gym in Braunstone has more posers and fewer steroid freaks than the Saffron Lane one. In all honesty, I kinda prefer having the steroid freaks about, since they're more fun to watch than some pretentious little bugger who thinks 30 kilos on a lats machine and a tight white sleeveless tshirt makes him the strongest man on the planet. On the more positive side, I managed to make myself do an hour of cardio stuff, which is probably a positive step.

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(no subject) [Oct. 5th, 2008|10:43 pm]
The one time I drive sensibly...

Coming back from my parents, twisty road so I'm going slowly. As I round a hairpin bend a fox stops walking across the road and bloody looks at me! I swerve onto the far side of the road and almost miss it, except it steps FORWARD... loud thwack, bump-bump, and when I stop in a pub car park for a shufti it's completely knackered my left foglight. Glorious.

So drive home, checking the engine temperature to make sure the radiator is still in one piece (appears so - gracias, $DeityOfChoice!) and have a quick go at putting foglight back.

Then I found part of the fox's bloody (quite literally) ear in the space where the foglight is meant to go.

I am _so_ happy right now. Years driving like an absolute loon and I'm fine. The one time I play vaguely safe I total a fox and part of my car.
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(no subject) [Sep. 18th, 2008|10:29 pm]
Dear Christ, where did the time go.
Seems like yesterday I was drunk in A-block, howling at the moon both literally and metaphorically.
"Right! Real world!" That was end of an era.

I wish I knew why I get like this. It's not really rose tinted glasses, as it seems like everything that was a few years back was in primary colours. Big, and bold, and bright and certain. Now... God knows.

I got drunk this weekend just gone. And it felt good. It was a sort of a return to more hectic times, where things were a random blur and so much better because of it. I guess a part of it was a desperate attempt to retreat to somewhere where that was allowed... where being still hammered at lunchtime the next day is congratulated, rather than seen as a liability.
It's almost enough to make me contemplate a PhD, apart from the money being crap. Even taxed to hell by a bunch of retards in Westminster, I'm still better off.

I suppose I've been working towards something for the past 11 years, and now I've got there, well what the hell am I supposed to do?
GCSEs give way to A-Levels, gives way to a degree, then a Masters, now ACA and what the fuck do I do next? I suppose by now I'm supposed to be married and have kids or something. I lack colour because of that?

I want to get drunk and stand three feet from a speaker the size of a washing machine again. I want to scream along to Enter Sandman in a club. I want to have that sort of lunacy in my life more often...

Or, to paraphrase this crap; I need to have weekends without accountability more often. I guess I've grown out of The Shirt, and I'm not happy with that. Time to find my wardrobe more often, I think. :-)
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(no subject) [Sep. 17th, 2008|08:32 pm]
Love in a woman's heart
I wanna have the whole and not a part
Strange that this feeling grows more and more
'Cause I've never loved someone like you before

Scooter. :-D
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(no subject) [Aug. 29th, 2008|08:40 pm]
Business Change - 74
Business Reporting - 69
Case Study - 59

Passed all exams, for the last time and I mean it now, ever!

So relieved it's untrue...
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